A Reminder

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12 years ago today I was a scared 18 year old girl who was just told by her doctor that I did not have the 5 weeks left of pregnancy I had planned on having but that I was going to meet my little boy today…he was coming whether I liked it or not.  It was a regular appointment so Justin was at work that day…I was told I had to go to the hospital in my doctors exam room at her office…my doctor was in the room, my mom was in the room, I was in the room, but I remember feeling it was just me and that baby…the whole world could have been in that room that day but in that moment it was just me and this little human being and he knew I was scared to death. My blood pressure was sky high, everything was being rushed, and Justin met us at the hospital with a look in his eyes that I know matched mine…panic. Where were we? How did we get here? What do I do? Is this gonna hurt? Will we love this thing? What if he looks like a goblin? Am I going to die? I silently prayed for strength…I know we all were at that time… and grace was given.  After a few hours of labor, my little peanut came into the world. I remember the marvel of it all. Looking down past my knees trying to get a good look…trying to meet my son… the light was so bright…the doctors bloody gloves held him tight and she lifted him up as if exalting to the Lord so I could have a good look at him and there he was…my son…my baby…this tiny miracle screaming his protests in the bright light, arms flailing for security in the open air…give. me. my. baby. That first look…no more panic now…I will protect you forever, I will love you the best I can, I will feed you, clothe you, kiss you, hug you and be your best mama until my last breath…God whispered in my ear as I watched in slow motion the doctor handing this tiny person to the nurse “you were made for this, never doubt Me again, I am for you always”. Look at my life, look at my testimony, He is a God that keeps His promises…He exceeded my expectations…my miracle is 12 today and there are moments when I look at Him and remember a whispered promise made to me all those years ago.

One comment

  1. Lisa says:

    So sweet. My sister has a 28 year old son after her similar experience. She was 1 week past her 18th birthday, married, our mom had died the year before, so no momma…terrifying to say the least. But she did it…now has 2 more boys and married to the same daddy! She has a tremendous testimony. I would love to hear yours.

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